life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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