i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize