Kiss
Puke
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
