Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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