yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
