Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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