he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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