that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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