I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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