He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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