using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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