i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
please come you make the beer taste better
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
