She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
