im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize