either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
