It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
