New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
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his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
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By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook