Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?

(206): View more from Washington

neither do i

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(386): View more from Florida

I wanna passion pit in your ass

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(732): View more from New Jersey

the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on

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(816): View more from Missouri

I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy

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19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Read it at the TFLN blog
(724): View more from Pennsylvania

how do flat chested girls get laid?

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(218): View more from Minnesota

i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.

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(813): View more from Florida

Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?

(203): View more from Connecticut

everyone's regretting their thursdays.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock

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(425): View more from Washington

I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now

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