i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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