why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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