Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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