Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
