My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
