I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
