69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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