just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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