Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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