We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
