oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
