508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
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He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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