Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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