oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
