Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
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As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
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U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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