i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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