He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
