I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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