where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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