Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
