Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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