I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
