And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
