we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
