the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
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She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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