you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize
