Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
