I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
