Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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