I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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