did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
