I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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