i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I wish there were birth control emojis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Randomize