alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
