I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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